chapter XVII

Three Cheers for the Bota Box

Sometimes it's nice to give credit where credit is due.   In my house, we drink a lot of wine.  We cook with a lot of wine.  Therefore, we generally have a lot of wine around.  My husband knows more about this subject than I do - we like to divide and conquer our areas of expertise...makes for good balance in a relationship. 

The only problem is, wine can be really expensive.  So in times like this, we look for bargains.  In general, the concept of "Bargain Wine" gives me a hangover just thinking about it.  Plonk = Headache.

But not always.  Enter, Bota Wines.  No, this is not a sponsored post (see beginning - I like to give credit where credit is due).  We bought a box of Bota Chardonnary not too long ago and it's not half bad.  It's actually, pretty darn nice for an everyday wine for drinking/cooking (btw, I would NEVER cook with a wine that I found undrinkable.  You are asking for trouble if you do this).  So thought I would share our discovery.  At $26 a box, you are bound to be happy and feel pretty smart.  Just don't tell.

And if you are reading this and find yourself horrified at the thought of boxed wine, screw you because you are obviously a TOTAL ELITIST snob don't take my word for it, read what Chow has to say.  Happy vino!

I just LOVE a well executed consumer product.  Send me some of your favorites.

Just A Little Sanskrit

Saw this today:

“To action alone hast thou a right and never at all to its fruits; let not the fruits of action be thy motive; neither let there be in thee any attachment to inaction”

Followed up by reading this:

Click on this link and read...

Made a whole lot of sense.  Something to keep in mind as you travel through this wild and precious life.  That last phrase, the one about this wild and precious life, that is not mine.  It's from Mary Oliver.  Read the whole thing here.

Lots to think about with these two links today. 

A Few of My Favorite Things...

Every so often I like to feel a little good about myself (don't lie, you do too).  I do lots of things to accomplish that goal...so after I finish rolling in caps and gowns from years past, staring at photos of my daughter, admiring my hot husband, reading brilliant essays on ladybugs composed when I was six (ok, seven) and being glad that I have yet to succumb to Botox (putting off the inevitable), I put on my wedding dress and..oops, anyway...I re-read this blog to see what the hell I am all about and what's been on my mind. 

There are several things on this blog that I re-read and say "WHAT the ?" to myself, and others that I read and say "Oh yeah, ok, yeah..." or "Damn, that was pretty good."  It's easy to forget what you've been thinking about over a few months...or at least, easy for me, so that is why I write.  As I re-read, these are the posts that stood out, for a variety of reasons.  

Aging
Selecting a VC
Sexism
Interviewing Skills
The Hamptons
Generosity
Hopes and Dreams for my daughter
Gorillas on the subway, of course
Maternity Leave
More Reasons I love to cook
Perhaps the funniest email I have ever read
Dear God, what the! !?@?!!

A Favorite Poem

I especially love the last line.  Keep that in mind...your one wild and precious life.

 

The Summer Day, by Mary Oliver

Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean—
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down—
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?

Life Lessons and Cooking and Eating

Two of my great passions are cooking and eating.  I started really cooking in business school and have since tried many many recipes, bought many cookbooks, and fed lots of friends.  Cooking is more than just a meal for me, it's therapy, creativity and pleasure.  I got to thinking about this the other day and realized, it's even more than that.  If I were a teacher, I might teach other life lessons through cooking and eating.  Enough with learning life lessons the hard way, learn a few the tasty way!  Here are some examples:

• The beauty of simplicity - roast a chicken.  Roasting a chicken can be a complicated affair, but I find the best way is to pop a washed and dried, salt and peppered chicken into a 400 degree oven for about an hour and let it go.  No need to mess with it, no basting.  Simply delicious.
• Things do not need to be expensive to be great - make potato and leak soup
• But luxury has its place - enjoy a glass of champagne and a blini with caviar
• Even things that don't appear great have potential if you just give them a little TLC - roast cauliflower tossed in olive oil, salt and peppered, at 400 degrees for about 20 minutes.  Prepare to be excited about cauliflower.
• Witness patience as a virtue - make risotto.
• Understand that some things take care of themselves and we don't need to control everything - tackle an Osso Bucco recipe.  Do very little, let it work it's magic and enjoy the fruits of your lack of labor.
• Less is more - eat a tomato or ear of corn in season
• Good things come in small packages - eat a fresh raw oyster
• Attention to detail - bake just about anything.  Baking requires exact measurements to be successful.
• Creativity - unlike baking, cooking requires that you taste and test and sometimes come up with substitute ingredients. 
• Appreciate what you have  - make pasta puttanesca...most of the ingredients should already be in your pantry (at least mine)
• Flexibility and respect - like Creativity, cook anything.  Even if you have made a recipe a hundred times, you need to be aware that every ingredient is unique, as is every oven and every burner. 
• Be a team player, but be clear about roles and responsibilities - cook with your spouse.  My husband loves to cook just as I do, but we have very different approaches.  We work well in the kitchen together because we have learned that one of us needs to be the stated Chef, and the other, the Sous Chef.  Clearly stated roles and objectives are key.
• Be in the now - cook pasta.  Overcooked pasta is disgusting.
• Everything is better with bacon - what a fun lesson!  Add bacon to just about anything and learn this - add it to salad, a sandwich, on top of a meatloaf, your Saturday morning french toast, even chocolate (weird but true).
• Don't take everything so seriously - if all else fails (like your recipe), order pizza and open a bottle of wine.  Your family or guests will still be happy.

Not Your Mother's Hot Chocolate

I have on occasion listed favorite things on this blog.  Tonight is no exception.  When in doubt, on a chilly night, try this hot chocolate.  And apparently you can make pot de creme from it as well. 

Yes, I think I have a new obsession.  Chocolate in a mug.  Delish.

Life Balance...A New Unreality Show

I have been thinking a lot about life balance lately.  I have come to a conclusion...it's not possible.  Don't call me negative!  I am a realist.  I mean come on...roll the "life balance" movie tape please...

You have a big career where you run things and do really really well; you eat dinner with your family five times a week at 6PM (where of course you make dinner...from scratch).  You maintain an active social life where you see friends and are a regular consumer of culture; you read all the latest and greatest books, keep up on pop culture, take four weeks of vacation, have sex with your significant other (OFTEN), sleep eight full cozy hours a night, work out three to five times a week and pay bills/run errands/get laundry done etc. etc. etc. 

I mean, come on.  And I am an embracer of chaos, but that type of existence seems just out of reach.  So I have two new ideas...you CAN have it all, just not all at once.  Yes, we might die tomorrow, but let's think positive...assuming you don't, there are different times in your life when you focus on different elements of your life while others go on the backburner.  It's about choosing which pot is on which burner.  Not easy decisions.  But reality - tradeoffs.

Next, I read something recently and darn it cannot remember where (probably Oprah magazine, which I always feel guilty buying but which I ALWAYS enjoy).  The article said that while seeking balance, look to presence for your answer.  What does this mean?  It means be where you are...as much as possible.  When at work, focus on work.  Leave your kids and family at home.  Focus on your job.  Be in it.  When at home, leave your work at work.  Be at the table with your kids.  Listen to what they say.  Have a conversation with your significant other where you are fully present.  Balance through presence. 

You may be saying "Not possible!  I always multi-task and that is how I get through my day."  Well, more and more research suggests that we are way less effective at every task when we multi-task. 

I am a big believer in presence, living in the present, being in the now.  It's not easy, and I am in no way good at it, but I aspire to it.  And I love the idea "Balance Through Presence".  So there we go.  My soapbox for the day.

I Love eBates

Just a little recommendation.  I started using eBates not too long ago and think it's one of the best tools out there.  I could blast all my friends with their Tell A Friend message, but that might be a tad obnoxious.  I am a fan of free money, and eBates is FREE MONEY.  Woo hoo!

It only adds one step to the process of online shopping.  Example: rather than starting at www.saks.com start at www.ebates.com.  From there go to Saks, shop as you normally would and lo and behold, a check arrives at your house a few months later with cash back from your purchase.  Oh yeah, and it has a nifty little pop up (I normally hate pop ups - this one is actually useful) that lists other promo codes for the store where you are shopping.  Badabing. 

And no, I am not getting paid for this!  I am simply recommending a cool service.  There is a lot of crap out there, and when I see something really great, I want to talk about it.

Favorite Posts

In a recent discussion with a friend about blogging, she asked me if I ever go back and read my older posts.  I said yes.  So then she asked if I have favorite posts.  I said I had not thought about it.  She said, "So think about it."  So I did.  And here they are, in no particular order:

Ode to Curves

It Must Be All That Thin Air

Tonight I Sit in A Gray Mushroom Cloud

Dead Fish

I Want

Christmas Time, and A Marriage Saved

Back on the High Horse Again!

Even Cats Get Colds

The F Word

Sarna and Arks V. The Gremlin

Smarty Takes A Bus To The Airport

Hell Yeah!

Confession

Acquiring Minds

Bridezilla's Revenge

Fingerpainting

My Def Celebrity Sighting

I cannot believe I forgot to mention this - I had the BEST celebrity sighting a couple of weeks ago.  I was at a media conference in NYC.  I was not really digging the presentations (crappy, also ran, tweaks on a theme kind of companies) so I decided to head to the lobby for a little networking (UUUGGHHHH I MUST change that word - "to network" - barf.  so self serving sounding.)  As I was saying, I headed to the lobby for a little networking and standing there in the middle of the lobby was none other than LL Cool J. 

I almost passed out.

I LOVE LL Cool J.  I am a huge hip hop fan - especially older stuff (as we hip hoppers say OLD SCHOOL...oh pardon, my white girl is showing).  But I really do love hip hop and am sure if I were not a venture capitalist, I would be a very famous A&R executive known for all the slammin' (note the use of hip hop vernacular) hip hop acts I would have launched.  Russell Simmons ain't got NOTHIN' on my bad self.

And there he was - like a god standing in the middle of the Mandarin Oriental hotel lobby.  I could practically hear the doves cooing in their beat box way. 

I picked my chin up off the floor, restrained myself from bum rushing dear LL (could it have been the 700 pound body guard that deterred me?) and sat down to watch him.  Sat nearly 5 feet from him.

I immediately texted a friend:

Me: "You will not believe this - I am sitting five feet from LL Cool J!"

Friend replies: "Why?"

Me: "Because he won't let me sit on his LAP, that's why."

It was a beautiful moment.  I worked at a hip hop company from 1999 - 2000...best time of my working life.  Bar none.  And that took me right back.